Sadly it was announced today that Carey Gabay who was shot in his head on the morning of the Labor Day festivities has been declared brain dead. Very much like when I heard the news of Kyle Jean-Baptiste’s death after falling from the fire-escape at his mother’s apartment, this bit of news has deeply saddened me.
Listen, aside from the fact that this epitomizes the height of senselessness – the reality of his being only forty-three, married (to a Trini, no less), expecting their first child and out with his brother to enjoy what should have at most been a foot-note on yet, just-another-day-in-the-life-of-a-man-living-and-loving-in-New York, has instead transformed into what looks like the opening sentences of his eulogy.
Don’t know about you all, but my black ass is tired. Truly. I am down to the bone weary of the foolishness we are forced to tolerate, simply by virtue of being a human being with the fortune/misfortune of living… at least for now. This man is the victim of the on-going dispute between two rival gangs. Idiots with lousy aims that ended life as they knew it for this man and those he loved and who love him. Now, these fucking idiots are carrying on their small-minded, uneducated, wastes of lives, while Mr. Gabay’s family is trying to come to terms with when to unplug him from the machine that is keeping his body here.
Today, today I do not want any of you people who are so quick to want to point out how unfairly we black people are always being treated by “the white man” to say one word to me! Truly. I can do without the fucking rhetoric! The bullshit excuses that “we are the way we are because we have been so persecuted, so down-trodden, so discriminated against!” Yes I get it… because our lives have been so very brutalized, our heads have been so messed up by the treatment we have gotten and continue to get, it absolves these fools of the act they committed against, oh shit get this… a black man! It’s not their fault though – their actions can be traced back to and can be laid at the feet of the all-powerful “white man”! Idiots! Not today!
I’m doing my best to try to remember a murder at say, the gay pride parade – you know, where all the truly weird, unnatural sinners are? Trying; but got nothing. Somehow though, every damned year that all us black folks get together somebody has to die! No, let me rephrase – we need to kill another of our own! But they’re the sinners!! And Father help us all if they were to cancel this damned parade (as they should)! I could hear the outcry now – all the foolishness about discrimination, racism, subjugation of our culture, heritage, blah blah, fucking blah!
I am sick and tired of the deaths, the killings, the murders, the hypocrisy. How about we learn to treat each other well, respectfully first before we call on anyone else to do so?! Know that, …speck in your own eye quote? How about we shut the fuck up with all that #blacklivesmatter business we spout to the “white people” and we adopt this – #respectyourown; because the truth is this – #blacksmakeblacklivessplatter
I am joining his family in grief; I pray for them the strength to endure. I ask God to grant his wife a safe pregnancy and delivery.
I pray for us all…